Procrastinator

An example of Alec's procrastination: searching for funny pictures on the internet.

Alec's newest and most profound work explores his vast experience in the field of procrastination.  His poem gives insight to the mind of a procrastinator.  This poem was the brainchild of his teacher, Mr. Saxon's, assignment- the reading of Jamaica Kincaid's "Girl": a poem that can only be described as a run-on that makes this sentence, it being extremely long and obnoxious, seem like a simple subject and predicate.  Living inside the stereotype of a procrastinator, Alec knows what he has got himself into and the perpetual cycle of putting something off.  It is a name that comes with a cost: he is constantly nagged to do work and even more constantly doesn't do work.  If one wanted to be a member of the Procrastinator clan, all you would need to do is read Alec's magnificent poem (a.k.a. nothing). 

Here is Alec's groundbreaking poem "Procrastinator":

Don’t you have that English homework to do?; so… yeah…. okay… just sit there; stare for a while; good, great; ummm… surf the web for a little; just a few minutes; okay, like an hour; maybe a little longer; great; shouldn’t you be doing something else?; no; oh, okay; so what are you doing now?; nothing; oh, okay; could you--; in a bit; just--; one second; fine; doodle for a bit now; look! Someone texted me; you should text him back; ANOTHER MESSAGE?; ANOTHER PERSON; look who’s popular; what is that she says?; check my Facebook?; it would be rude to not obey her wishes; that’s a cool video; woah, they have other videos; and those videos are related to those videos; should watch all of them; that reminds me of a movie; YOU SHOULD WATCH THAT MOVIE; IT’S SUCH A GOOD MOVIE; was I right?; how good is this movie; you look tired, you should get some sleep; good night; good morning; didn’t you have that thing to do?; CRAP, YOU DID; you should do that… right after I watch “Little Bear”.

Breathtaking, is it not?  It gives Alec whole new depth that was previously unknown to his many adoring fans.  While Alec has seemingly come to terms with his stereotype he can still kick the habit.